To most, my life seems very mediocre, uneventful, and very “small”. I live in a small apartment with my two small children. I work, I go to the gym, and do small events with others when the opportunity arises. I don’t travel or go on vacations. I’m single-ish, and don’t date much any more. Not from a lack of opportunity, more a lack of interest in the options that have come my way (this topic is in and of itself another blog entirely).
My life is simple. It is also stagnant.
Despite how far I’ve come, it’s not enough. Not even close. I have so much to do that has been put off for whatever lame excuses I can come up with. I’ve suddenly had this overwhelming urge to be a nazi* about getting life in order.
Thank you, Jackson…
I have been wanting to finish my nursing degree for some time. I have a few prereqs left, but still a long way to go, and an even longer waiting list. This is something that is kind of a passion of mine, and I would love to become a nurse practitioner in the future, specializing in either hospice or labor and delivery. Either helping them join the world, or leave….
I want lots of it. I don’t have a desire to live in a mansion, or to have ten cars, and I DON’T want a boat. However, I want enough money to where, should I ever want these things and more, the option is there. I want to be able to save money for emergencies, rainy days, and for my kids. I want to be three notches above comfortable, and I want my little family to have a good life. I don’t think that’s unreasonable. Yes, there’s the whole, “money doesn’t buy happiness” blah blah blah, and… and yeah, that is mostly true. Having a lot of money would give me one less thing to worry about so I can focus on the things that make me happy though.
Our apartment is about 650 square feet. It provides us with functional space: two rooms, a place to cook, a place to carry out the daily S’s, a place to watch our small television, and a balcony to watch the moon rise, sit with my morning coffee, and to give a place for my friends to smoke. This is all fine and well, and I’m proud of it, considering it’s our first place. I really want a house though. Not a huge one in an upper class community, but a simple, well laid out, possibly two story house with a very large back yard, a pool, and a place to plant some rose bushes, because I happen to like roses. They are pretty, and they smell nice. I’m all about the little things…
I’m a plastic surgeon’s wet dream. I went from meth-induced skinny to a large mammal in a short amount of time, and have since lost a considerable amount of weight. I am a good woman, and I want to look the part. Plus breasts are amazing. I really want a beautiful set. Not to mention, I’m hoping one day I’ll have a man to share life with, and I want to make sure he is happy with what he sees. This shouldn’t matter, but it does, a lot.
I love to write, but I don’t do it very often. I used to be able to spit out quality songs, stories, essays, and poetry in very short amounts of time, but over the years have lost my touch. I may just use this blog as a catalyst to reconnect with this outlet and hone my skills again. I often hesitate posts due to a lack of having something intelligent or useful to share, or for being too personal, but then I remembered I don’t really give a shit if people like what I have to say. I’ll be posting whatever I feel from now on, from my mundane happenings to the profound and extraordinary.
I’ll add more to this list as time goes on.
*This is taken from dictionary dot com, and is part of the definition of the word “nazi”:
(often lowercase) a person who is fanatically dedicated to or seeks to control a specified activity, practice, etc.: a jazz nazi who disdains other forms of music; tobacco nazis trying to ban smoking.
I, in no way shape or form, adhere to any nazi way of thought or life style. The word was used here to convey a feeling only. No Jews were harmed in the writing of this blog, literally or in thought.